The phrase “it’s complicated” seems to have its origins in discussions about relationships. Despite their complexity, there are stable considerations that cut across all love relationships. One prominent factor in particular, though not widely noted, is that love requires the ability and willingness to be vulnerable. Some of us are not ready, perhaps because of our upbringing, or we are temporarily stuck due to the current events in our lives. Furthermore, if the new love also has his or her problems, the future will likely be bumpy at best. Not enough vulnerability will freeze a relationship, but too much will melt it.


Feeling vulnerable


Vulnerable literally means ‘capable of being hurt’. In general, we speak of being vulnerable when we feel vulnerable and emotionally permeable. The way most of us think about vulnerability is that it is not a pleasant experience and should be avoided if possible. It is associated with weakness rather than strength. Maybe so, but the ability to be vulnerable and tolerate vulnerability is essential to love.


From the first time our feelings are hurt as children, we begin to struggle with the issue of vulnerability. How much of ourselves do we expose, and how much of ourselves do we suppress in order to be loved? Although we have no words for it, we observe our parents to see how they deal with their vulnerability. When our parents are guarded and closed off, they serve as role models for exercising emotional prudence. The old saying: “Don’t show too much of yourself, because she will use it against you,” becomes part of our unwritten rules of life.


On the other hand, if our parents are open and bold in showing who they are and how they think about things, we are likely to enter the world with refreshing courage. But even if our youth the experience is positive, a mature love relationship is a challenge. Because it is precisely in this experience, a love relationship, that the potential to feel vulnerable is greatest.


Let’s count the ways


There are countless ways you can feel vulnerable – if you’re afraid of losing your partner’s love and respect, if you’ve done something that turned out badly, if you’re afraid someone will discover your limitations – and that we’ve all experienced it. suffered by some of them. In an attempt to control the situation, it is common to turn the tables and go on the offensive.


Instead of facing the feeling of vulnerability, some people withdraw, others become critical of someone else or hide the feeling of vulnerability behind it humor or laughterand still others, especially in a new and not yet fully established love, are simply released on bail. This is most likely to occur if someone enters into a relationship and he or she is emotionally unable to cope with the experience of vulnerability that comes with growing love. Maybe it’s too soon after a breakup, or right after a loss, or maybe while the pain of other disappointments is still prominent. In all these cases, the willingness to be more vulnerable will probably lag behind.


Build emotional muscles


Does all this mean that those of us who aren’t quite ready for the vulnerability that comes with new love are hiding instead? Not at all. In fact, that would probably be counterproductive.


Some suggestions to prepare for lasting love as you recover from loss or other heartbreaking experiences include the following: Take some time for yourself. Whether it’s catching up on some reading, going back to the gym, just going for long walks, or maybe hanging out and catching up with old friends you haven’t seen in a while. Whatever calms you and doesn’t challenge you emotionally will give you time to collect yourself.


The fear of losing control leads to losing control


Instead of acting out of the belief that you should be in control, practice letting go. Avoid tightening your grip on your feelings as best you can. Many of us fear lose control. However, if you express your feelings and resist the temptation to be defensive, you are less likely to lose control. For example, getting angry or crying is not losing control, but merely expressing intense feelings. In fact, the very fear of losing control usually results in denial of feelings—feelings that get in the way of your ability to tolerate healthy vulnerability.


If you feel like it, spend time with a friend or family member who you trust and feel safe with; use self-revealing statements to share your feelings sensitively. This may seem to put you in a weaker position, but in reality the opposite is true. It is an experience that will expand and strengthen your ability to tolerate vulnerability. In fact, a special kind of inner strength is evoked when sincere feelings are expressed.



Relationships Essential reading



Following the above guidelines will help provide the strength and courage to love well; gathering the courage to be vulnerable without feeling overwhelmed.



Sitemap of vpknxdlwcm.omarralno.online

Cannabis News RSS Feeds: Weedrss.com

1000+ unique media and news posts every 24 hours…

Published 2 hours ago
Published 7 hours ago
Published 13 hours ago
Published 16 hours ago
Published 17 hours ago
Published 17 hours ago
Published 20 hours ago
Published 21 hours ago
Published 21 hours ago
Published 21 hours ago
Published 22 hours ago